A workshop for parents of teenagers was held at the Hagwilget Small Hall last Friday to help parents understand how easily their children can develope an addictive habit.
Drugs were the main topic of conversation, but presenter Hal Wilhite, youth mental health clinician, wants parents to know people can get addicted to anything and the reason for the vice is what needs to be understood.
“Most addictions are caused by some form of pain,” Wilhite said.
“But rather than holding the pain and processing the pain we self medicate.”
Wilhite warns of the programming parents may unknowingly foist on their children at an early age.
“You might respond to your young child’s crying by giving them a cookie and this sends the wrong message to them,” he said.
Addictive behaviour can be found in nearly every facet of modern society, Wilhite said, but the way to avoid bad habit forming in children and youth has a simple solution.
“Provide your children with unconditional love, empathy and respect,” he said.
Adding, the simple solutions are usually the ones that take the most effort.
He referenced his own childhood relationship with his father to show how confusing a difficult conversation can be.
“My father would often get very frustrated when talking with me and I always wondered whether he was angry at the poor choice I made or angry at me,” Wilhite said.
“To avoid that with your children you must let them know that you respect and love them despite being disappointed in their decision making.”
By constantly communicating with your child you will be able to notice changes in behaviour and potentially an early stage of a harmful habit forming, of which Wilhite has determined there are five.
First is the experimentation phase, which is normal for most teenagers.
“Humans are curious beings and word of mouth is powerful,” Wilhite said.
“At this stage they aren’t trying to find a substance, rather they try something because others are.”
Second is the recreational phase, where a person begins to seek out a certain substance because it is thought to bring some benefit to their life.
“This is where normalization happens,” he said, adding the pervasiveness of advertising for alcohol on television promotes the elevation of enjoyment in a given activity.
“Commercials claim that a few beers will make the football game, backyard barbecue or hockey game better,” he said.
The recreational phase is where all negative addiction begins, Wilhite said.
“Emotional and mental conditioning occurs at this stage and the societal pressure is immense,” he said.
Next is the habituation phase, where the substance or activity begins to affect a person physically and a change in thought process occurs.
In addition to food and drugs; sex, gambling and power are noted as being highly addictive, Wilhite said.
“We’re all set up to develope addictive behaviour,” he said.
Second to last is the abuse phase, where the substance begins to have a negative impact on a person’s life.
Wilhite recalled Gabor Maté once became addicted to classical music to the point that he cut a patients session short so he could purchase an album he already owned.
Next is full addiction, where the substance or activity consumes a large portion of time and thought for a person.
“Commitments, such as, homework, social events or jobs become secondary to the addiction,” he said.
“Other expectations become secondary to the vice.”
Another key to avoiding a full blown addiction in youth is to allow them to live their own life.
“Let your child know it is OK to make mistakes,” Wilhite said.
“That way they learn to become problem solvers on their own.”
If a person develops a harmful addiction to a substance Wilhite maintains that a person should still be seen as a value to the community, however imbalanced they become.
“They should never be seen as criminals or immoral if they become an addict,” Wilhite said.
“It is not a criminal issue it is a health issue.
“Their reasoning has been undermined, they have a disease, but it can be addressed.”
A workshop on anxiety is set for March 15.